2024 Life Logs, Day 300: 50 Years Later
Date: Sunday, October 27, 2024
Weather: Sunny, Cool, Windy; High Temp 54, Low 39 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

Our wedding day … Sunday, October 27, 1974. Yes, 50 years ago today Mark and I were married at sunrise on Lovers Key in Fort Myers Beach, Florida. Only a few members of Mark’s family were present. Mark and I wrote our wedding vows that ended with poems from James Kavanaugh’s book, “There are Men Too Gentle to Live Among Wolves.” Mark died on September 11, 2016, two months before Donald Trump was elected President. Mark was absolutely certain that the goodness in the souls of the people of this country would never allow a man like Donald Trump to be elected. He was wrong. If Mark were alive today and heard Donald Trump’s closing argument speech at Madison Square Garden this evening, I know he would maintain that there is no way the people of this country will elect him a second time. I wish with all my heart that he will be right this time.

In honor of what would be our 50th wedding anniversary if Mark were still living, I want to share our wedding vows. Reading them after 50 years makes me hope that there is a kinder, gentler way forward for our nation if the “searchers” prevail. Our children and grandchildren deserve that.

MARK: As the sun rises and a new week begins, so do Judy and I begin a new life together. We have something to read that expresses how we feel at this very special time.  Judy and I are among the searchers. There are, I believe, millions of us. We are not unhappy, but neither are we really content. We continue to explore life, hoping to uncover its ultimate secret. We continue to explore ourselves, hoping to understand. We like to walk along the beach, we are drawn by the ocean, taken by its power, its unceasing motion, its mystery and unspeakable beauty. We like forests and mountains, little streams and tall trees, deserts and hidden rivers. Our sadness is as much a part of our lives as is our laughter. To share our sadness with one we love is perhaps as great a joy as we can know … unless it be to share our laughter.

JUDY: We searchers are ambitious only for life itself, for everything beautiful it can provide. Most of all we want to love and be loved. We want to live in a relationship that will not impede our wandering, nor prevent our search, nor lock us in prison walls; that will take us for what little we have to give. We do not want to prove ourselves to another or to compete for love.  For Mark and me this marriage is the public pledge of our love for each other … my love for Mark …

MARK: And my love for Judy.

JUDY: In this pledge we wish to state our hopes for our relationship. We hope we will grow through the years to become stronger individuals and we hope our love will grow with us. Two people do not stay the same throughout a lifetime, but where there is love they change together. We hope we will have children and maintain a strong family union. In modern days the family structure has become weak, but we want to rear our children in a situation where we can all work side by side in everything we do … where we can all share equally in the joys and hardships of being a family and providing for ourselves. We make no promise to honor and obey…. only to love. I promise to cheer Mark when he is down and rejoice with him when times are good. I hope he will do the same by me.

MARK: I am here to pledge my love and to wed my life to yours with the hope that we may always be among those …
Who can hear the honking of geese
Above the sound of traffic
Who can hear the weeping of boys
Above the sound of mortars
Who refuse to take life as it is—
Because it wasn’t always.
—————————-
There is quiet water
In the center of your soul,
Where a son or daughter
Can be taught what no man knows.

There’s a fragrant garden
In the center of your soul,
Where the weak can harden
And a narrow mind can grow.

There’s a rolling river
In the center of your soul,
An eternal giver
With a rich and endless flow.

There’s a land of muses
In the center of your soul,
Where the rich are losers
And the poor are free to go.

So, remain with me, then,
To pursue another goal
And to find your freedom
In the center of your soul.

2024 Life Logs, Day 299: Still Fighting the Cold
Date: Saturday, October 26, 2024
Weather: Mostly Sunny; High Temp 64, Low 37 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

It has been a bit of a mysterious day in terms of this cold I have. I woke up feeling good. No sniffles. It felt like I had kicked the cold, so Shadow and I took off on a long walk downtown and back. I still felt good when we returned, but to be on the safe side, I decided to eat breakfast and take a nap so I would have plenty of energy to go to Ollie’s soccer game in Lakeview, which is off Cape, this afternoon. I cuddled up on the couch with an afghan Heather made for her dad. I got it out on Friday when I felt so bad and was a bit chilled. When I got up from the nap, I felt a little sniffly, but I thought it was just because I been lying down. I got in the car to drive to Lakeview, and it wasn’t long before I realized I was all the way back to where I was yesterday. I felt horrible and just couldn’t figure out why. My eyes were so weepy I could hardly see the road and the sniffles had turned to a faucet. Before I got to the bridge, I had to turn around and head home. Things got no better as the afternoon progressed, but I had to go out to buy a few food items, so I did that. Heather had sent a message saying it was sunny and beautiful down on the beach and that maybe I should come sit and read on the beach. I did go by the beach and said hello to Heather, but decided not to stay because I was so sniffly. But even while I was standing there talking to her, the sniffles got a bit better. Why the instant reversal? I mentioned to her that maybe I am allergic to something in my living room since I get better if I am in the bedroom overnight or out of the house. I came home, fixed dinner, and continued to get better. Then I curled up on the couch with that afghan again, and almost instantaneously I got worse. So, my theory is that I am allergic to that afghan and since I have a cold already, it just compounds the situation. It has been about an hour since I put the afghan away, and already I am better. I sure hope the mystery is solved and that I keep going in a positive direction from here forward.

2024 Life Logs, Day 298: Lost the Battle
Date: Friday, October 25, 2024
Weather: Mostly Sunny, Cooler; High Temp 59, Low 47 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

I have been fighting what I thought was a sinus issue for three days, but today I lost the battle. In fact, I totally crashed. Until today, the symptoms were just a runny nose and I took Sudafed when I went out to keep it under control. Since I didn’t have to go anywhere this morning, I didn’t take the Sudafed and by noon I was a mess. I don’t have a fever, but my body aches from head to toe and my head is stuffed with fluff. I think the problem is a classic common cold. I spent most of the day on the couch reading and sleeping except for going to pick up Ollie after school. I came right back home and slept until 6 pm and actually am feeling a bit better as the evening progresses.

I have never wished to be in Texas, but tonight I wish I was in Houston listening to Willie Nelson performing at the Harris rally. It has been delayed as the VP needed to get a briefing in the Situation Room about the latest developments in Iran before heading on to Texas. But she is on her way or there now and she and Beyonce will be on soon. I will stay up to watch that and then on to bed, hoping I will wake up in the morning feeling great and thinking today was just a bad dream.

2024 Life Logs, Day 297: Field Trip to Historic Lexington
Date: Thursday, October 24, 2024
Weather: Sunny AM, Turning Cloudy in the PM; High Temp 68, Low 44 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

It is 10:30 pm on Tuesday evening, April 18, 1775. The Provincial leaders in Boston, Massachusetts, learn that British General Gage has issued orders for 700 British soldiers to march to Concord to remove all the military supplies the locals have gathered. The King of England wants Gage to calm things down in Boston and thinks removing the ammunitions will help to avoid a war. The colonists discover what is happening, and Paul Revere has two lanterns lit in the belfry of North Church to signal that the British are headed to Concord.

By midnight, Paul Revere, William Dawes, and other riders leave Boston to spread the word around the countryside. Samuel Adams and John Hancock, who are known revolutionaries, are hiding out at the Hancock-Clarke House in Lexington.

Dawes and Revere arrive to warn them that they need to leave to avoid the British, ride on towards Concord, and are captured by a British patrol. Another rider, Samuel Prescott, rides on to carry the word to Concord. Dawes is released and later Revere is released and heads back to the Hancock-Clarke House to find Adams and Hancock have not left yet.

Fast forward to 5 am, now Wednesday, April 19. Lexington’s militia await the arrival of the British at Buckman’s Tavern in Lexington.

As the British approach, the militia gather on the Lexington Common. They are led by young Captain John Parker who tells the men, “Don’t fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here.” The British also have orders not to engage, but when they arrive, shots are fired. Eight British soldiers are killed, and more are wounded. The British escape to treat the injured at Munroe Tavern just a mile from the Lexington Commons and then regroup and head on to Concord.

By 7:30, the British arrive at the North Bridge in Concord and are met by 450 militia and minutemen. By 9 am, the militia see smoke coming from the center of Concord, assume the British are ransacking the town, and are now saying, “Let it begin here.”

4:30 pm, the British are outnumbered, drop their heavy arms, and hightail it back to Boston. The colonial forces have grown to 3,600 men.

7:30 pm, the British barely make it back to Boston by sundown. The American Revolution has begun.

The Encore field trip today began with a guided tour of the Hancock-Clarke House, then on to Buckman Tavern for a guided tour. We had lunch in Lexington center, walked up to the Belfry,

through the Lexington Common, and on to Munroe Tavern for one last guided tour. On our way out of town, we stopped by Wilson Farm Market which had everything fruit, vegetable, and pumpkin, and then home. It was a warm and gorgeous day, with a cloudless, deep blue sky in the morning, turning cloudy in the afternoon. But the colorful foliage in Lexington kept things bright.  What a beautiful fall day for a wonderful field trip.

2024 Life Logs, Day 296: Birthday Luncheon, Senior Soccer Night, Wine Group
Date: Wednesday, October 23, 2024
Weather: Sunny; High Temp 68, Low 55 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

It was a busy day, but thanks to Shadow, I at least begin every day with a mile walk that helps keep me centered. But today, after that walk, I got food prepared for my wine group tonight and then went to a belated birthday luncheon for Jane Woodin. We ate at Sage Hibachi in Mashpee and I think all of us liked it enough that we will spread the word and will definitely return.

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After a late lunch, I returned home to play with Shadow, pick up the food for my wine group tonight, and then went to the middle school to pick up Ollie. Jed met us there and we all headed to the turf field at the high school for Sam’s last home game. Just to write that takes my breath away and brings tears. After 14 years of watching him play soccer, it just doesn’t seem real that I won’t see him playing again. This was Senior Night and all of the senior players walked onto the field with their parents. That was special enough. But added to that was that Sam’s first best friend, Sebastian, was home from boarding school in the Netherlands to watch the game tonight. I first met Sebastian at Sam’s first birthday party. They have been friends since birth and it was so special that Sebastian was there tonight. When Mark and I returned from sailing around the world, some of my first photos are of Sam and Sebastian playing soccer in 2011.

I say it too often, but where have the years gone?

I stayed to watch the beginning of the soccer game, but I then had to leave to go to my wine group. Tonight was Friendsgiving Night where we shared a Thanksgiving food favorite with a wine to pair with it. We call ourselves the “best wine group ever” and I believe we are.

2024 Life Logs, Day 295: Sunny and 70
Date: Tuesday, October 22, 2024
Weather: Sunny; High Temp 71, Low 55 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

When I was a kid and there was a wonderful warm period in the fall, we called it Indian Summer. That term is no longer encouraged, seen as disrespectful of Native American people. The term Second Summer is preferable. Today the thermometer reached 70 degrees and it felt like those times in the fall when I was going up that we called Indian Summer. It made me wonder what the definition of Indian Summer was when I was growing up and why it was called that in the first place. What I found out is that a weather phase had to have 3 characteristics to be called Indian Summer. It had to sunny, it had to unseasonably dry and warm, and it had to follow the first killing frost of the season and usually a rainy period. It was also often hazy. Well, we haven’t had the first killing frost and it isn’t hazy, but it was sunny, dry, and warm yesterday and today. I’ll take that as a little Second Summer and hope that we have a third and a fourth and even a fifth! As to the origin of the Indian Summer label, there is no agreement. “The first recorded use of the term was in 1778 in a letter by French-American soldier and farmer J. H. St. John de Crèvecoeur, also known as Michel-Guillaume-Jean de Crèvecoeur. He wrote that sometimes the rain was followed by an interval of calm and warm which he said was called the Indian summer.”

I started this lovely day by taking a morning walk with Shadow. We had another coyote encounter just up the street. I didn’t see the critter, but Shadow did. He or she was crossing the street coming toward us when Shadow turned in that direction and went into his very loud ‘get outta here coyote’ barking fit. It worked and the coyote ran, but I am not liking these close encounters. When we got home, I had to deal with another issue in my sister’s life. After phone calls and emails, I put that aside for today and I prepared a fall salad for my Lunch-In at noon. It was a small group, but all of the food was delicious. After the luncheon, I stopped by Heather and Jed’s to check in on the boys. This was an Early Release Day from school. Sam and Jonah are fine on their own, but I like to make sure Ollie isn’t alone all afternoon. He had been biking with friends, but they went home to play on the Xbox. He eventually hooked up with them through Xbox and played with them that way. Then they went biking again. I just hung out and spent the time reading. I left for a bit to take Shadow out for a pee break and when I returned it was time to take Ollie to his private sax lesson. That was it for a day in this life.

2024 Life Logs, Day 294: Another Warm Fall Day
Date: Monday, October 21, 2024
Weather: Sunny; High Temp 68, Low 53 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

The weather is just delightful today … sunny, warm, not too windy, just right. The trees tell me it is definitely fall. Today I noticed a tree that I can see from the end of my driveway that is just beautiful.

Unfortunately, I spent most of the day in the kitchen and on my computer. I got dinner ready for the Goldpebbles for tonight, prepped the fall salad I will take to a luncheon tomorrow, and prepped the dish I will take as my wine pairing to our wine group’s Friendsgiving on Wednesday evening. I picked Ollie up from school, took him home, and then went to the high school soccer game. It is the first time I have seen Sam and Jonah on the field at the same time and I am sure I was glowing with pride.

i.

Heather had Select Board tonight and Jed had Health Board, so I served dinner to the Goldpebbles and hung out with them until Jed got home. When I got home, I watched some of the Select Board Meeting and again I was glowing with pride as I watched Heather in action.

2024 Life Logs, Day 293: Just Me and My Shadow
Date: Sunday, October 20, 2024
Weather: Sunny; High Temp 65, Low 51 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

This was a quiet Sunday with just me and Shadow muddling through a beautiful fall day. I had some Encore work to do this morning and then I spent time outside weeding. There is a common, but very invasive plant that is trying to take over the edges of the backyard commonly called Lady’s Thumb. It is an annual plant in the buckwheat/smartweed (Polygonaceae) family family and is considered an herb. In folk medicine it is said to prevent gastric cancer. And some species are edible. All well and good, but it literally takes over everything. There is a wonderful patch of Lemon Balm in the same area. The Lady’s Thumb is growing under and over that, so I am pulling as much of it as I can from around the Lemon Balm because I love the way it smells. After my back had enough of weeding, I needed to take a long walk, so Shadow and I walked over to Heather and Jed’s just to see what was happening there today. They were working on the deck replacement project. Ollie had gone with his friend Seton and his family to the Wellfleet Oyster Festival and Sam and Jonah were in their rooms. Heather and Jed had friends coming to dinner, so they were stopping the deck project to go food shopping. That reminded me that I needed to go food shopping as well, so Shadow and I headed home. My little bit of food shopping required that I go to 3 different stores and took almost two hours. Part of that time was spent talking to a friend of Heather and Jed’s that I haven’t seen for a few years. Her son used to play soccer with Sam when they were in elementary school and now that son is taking a gap year, and in a few days will be sailing from Fiji to New Zealand. Somehow, we managed to talk for well over half an hour. It was almost dark when I got home, so I played a quick game of fetch with Shadow and called it a day.

Tomorrow, I will spend the entire day in the kitchen. I am fixing dinner for the Goldpebbles as Heather and Jed are both off to meetings in the late afternoon and evening. Then on Tuesday I am taking a butternut squash and beet salad to a luncheon, and I need to bake the squash and beets tomorrow. On Tuesday night I have my wine group and I am taking tiny baked honeynut squash filled with toasted walnuts as my pairing for my choice of a wine for Thanksgiving dinner. I will bake the honeynut squash tomorrow as well. I will get a break from food preparation on Wednesday as I am going out to lunch with friends to celebrate Jane Woodin’s birthday. It was a couple of weeks ago, but this Wednesday was the first date the five of us could get together. Then on Thursday I go on an all-day field trip to historic Lexington. Thank goodness my calendar is clear on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday except one soccer game on Saturday. I’m sure things will be added as the week progresses, but hopefully I can rest up to get ready for another week in the life.

2024 Life Logs, Day 292: More Soccer, Mingle & Mix
Date: Saturday, October 19, 2024
Weather: Sunny; High Temp 62, Low 49 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

This is Falmouth High School’s Homecoming Weekend, and it was a beautiful afternoon to sit in the sun and watch Sam and Jonah play in the Homecoming soccer game. And even better, we won 1-0. Then this evening I went to an Encore Mingle & Mix and had a lovely evening. So, most of the day was delightful, but it started out with call telling me my sister had fallen during the night. On one of the hourly checks, she was found in the floor near her bed. The good news is that she is fine. The bad news is that she forgot that she is not supposed to get up without using her call button to summon help and wait for someone to come. I talked with her and tried to reinforce this, but her dementia allows her to quickly forget. At least this time the fall didn’t result in a fractured bone.

2024 Life Logs, Day 291: Free and Easy Day, Evening at The Narrows
Date: Friday, October 18, 2024
Weather: Partly Sunny, Windy; High Temp 58, Low 42 degrees F
Location: At Home on Lakeview Avenue, Falmouth, MA

My calendar was blank today until mid -afternoon, so I had a free and easy morning. I did book my flight to Puerto Rico for Thanksgiving. I opted for going the week of Thanksgiving since that is when the kids will have time off school even though it was more expensive. I get to Ziggy and Coco only once or twice a year, so when I do fly down, I need to time my visits for maximum time with them. I now need to find someone to come stay with Shadow and then I can fully celebrate that I am going.

Jane Woodin dropped by to visit in the early afternoon, and we had a good chat. After she left, I baked a leaf pie that I will take as an appetizer to a Mingle and Mix tomorrow night. I went to pick up Ollie after school and then it was time to head to Fall River with Judy Fenwick to a Paula Poundstone performance tonight at The Narrows, an arts and music venue. I don’t know when I last laughed as hard as I did tonight. I know of Paula Poundstone from NPR’s Wait, Wait… Don’t Tell Me! She is funny on that program, but I had no idea she was a stand-up comedian who absolutely hilarious. How good it is to laugh.