by Judy Handley | Jul 24, 2026 | 2026 Life Logs |
2026 Life Logs, Day 205: Broken Promise
Date: Friday, July 24, 2026
Weather: Sunny; High Temp 81, Low 58 degrees F
Location: At Home with My Shadow, Falmouth, MA
I had another one of those nights where I woke up at 4 am thinking of the all the things I need to do for my sister and trying to figure out how I am going to come up with a plan for dealing with her diabetes. I had promised myself I was going to spend the day at the beach, but when Ollie texted and said he couldn’t go to the beach because he had to mow lawns, I switched gears and spent the rest of the morning on the phone or on email with Patsy issues, and then I went to visit her and talk with the Director of Wellness. I really do feel like I have lost control of my life because of all my sister’s issues that arise constantly. I have to figure this out, but in the meantime, I just have to keep on doing.
by Judy Handley | Jul 23, 2026 | 2026 Life Logs |
2026 Life Logs, Day 204: What a Mess
Date: Thursday, July 23, 2026
Weather: Mostly Sunny; High Temp 80, Low 61 degrees F
Location: At Home with My Shadow, Falmouth, MA
You don’t want me to write a blog tonight because it would be a total tirade on everything in the world. I am a mess, our country is a mess, the world is becoming a mess with us, my sister’s healthcare situation is a mess. So, there you have it. But I can’t help myself.
I tried to do something normal this afternoon. I picked Ollie up to take him to Corner Cycle to buy a new tire for his bicycle. Just as we turned into the parking lot, my sister’s primary care called. I had been waiting for this call since last evening. So, with Ollie having to sit and listen, I was asked to brainstorm with the primary care what medications my sister should be given for her diabetes. I know nothing about diabetes and less about the medications to treat it. But the goal is get her off insulin injections, so I guess I had better learn about these things quickly. When she said she was going to put her on Metformin, I did have to say no way. She was taken off that four years ago because it made her lose weight. So much so that she got down to 77 pounds. The primary care listened, she came up with another possibility, and wee agreed on a plan to make the change. She was going to make the change immediately, but I had to insist that we wait until Monday to make sure the new meds have been delivered. Been there, done that in May when her meds were changed on a Friday and the insulin prescribed didn’t arrive for three days. Like I said in the beginning, it is better that I stop writing. It is just too crazy and too depressing and scary.
by Judy Handley | Jul 22, 2026 | 2026 Life Logs |
2026 Life Logs, Day 203: Small World
Date: Wednesday, July 22, 2026
Weather: Mostly Overcast, Morning Rain; High Temp 74, Low 64 degrees F
Location: At Home with My Shadow, Falmouth, MA
Mark and I met Dick and Claire Wiklund in 2003 when we started living aboard Windbird in Boston. They lived aboard a beautiful trawler during the week and returned to their home in North Falmouth on Friday afternoons. Dick was the head of OR at Mass General and needed to be at work in the wee hours of the morning, thus commuting from the Cape was just not an option. And it was Dick, after reading my log in December of 2011 when I announced that Mark had been diagnosed with colon cancer, who contacted me immediately and got me in touch with his best friend who was head of surgery at Mass General. During the years when Mark was battling cancer, we lost contact with Dick and Claire, but I still think of them often. This afternoon I attended a Family Forum at Bridges, and a woman came up to me that I didn’t recognize at first. It was Claire. Dick has been at Bridges for two years. It really is a small world.
I spent my morning getting my sister’s health insurance transferred to Massachusetts and I started working on a spreadsheet outlining her monthly finances in her new ‘home’. Then after the Family Forum at Bridges and a visit with Patsy, I met up with Jane Woodin, and we went to an event at Woodwell Climate Research Center. It was good to spend some time focusing on something other than my sister’s issues.
by Judy Handley | Jul 21, 2026 | 2026 Life Logs |
2026 Life Logs, Day 202: Ups and Downs
Date: Tuesday, July 21, 2026
Weather: Sun, then Overcast, Windy/Thunderstorms; High Temp 78, Low 64 degrees F
Location: At Home with My Shadow, Falmouth, MA
My morning started at Bridges with my sister. We had a nice, but short visit before the physical therapist came to do an evaluation. Halleluiah! I have been trying to get this done since Patsy’s first week at Bridges, but insurance issues complicated the matter. The young woman who came was wonderful with Patsy and prescribed a plan to try and get her walking again. She says Patsy has the strength, just not the will. But at least we now have a plan. The problem of keeping her falling out of bed is trickier. In order to have a bed rail, you have to go through a lot of red tape and are not normally successful. Memory care facilities cannot restrain residents and installing a bed rail does just that. If I understand correctly, you have to get permission from some state office. So, alternatives were offered. One is to get a hospital bed with a specific type of mattress. I think that costs a couple of thousand dollars and I have already spent $1800 on her current bed, mattress, waterproof mattress covers, sheets, blanket, etc. The hospital bed will be a different size, so I will have to buy all of the stuff again. I will begin to figure this out tomorrow and see where the search takes me. So, the upside is that Patsy is fully capable of walking again, but the downside is just how to make that happen. And in the meantime, we have to find a way to keep her from falling out of bed and fracturing something.
After leaving Bridges, I went home to change into beach wear and then did something for myself. I went to the beach. By the time I got there, it was overcast and windy, but I didn’t care. I was sitting on the beach for the first time this summer and I enjoyed every minute of it.
Then it was back home to change and then go back to Bridges for a Family Support Group meeting. I am not sure I will go to another one of those. There were eight of us, all women, and only one other person caring for someone other than a spouse. It was heartbreaking to hear their stories. Some are caring for husbands at home, and four others have husbands at Bridges. The hour and a half with these women convinced me to go home and celebrate Mark’s life. He fought cancer for 5 years, but the stories these women were telling made the cancer battle sound like a walk in the park. Dementia is a demon.
The first thunderstorm happened before I left Bridges and they have continued throughout the evening. Right now it is pouring rain, accompanied by a chorus of thunder. We need the rain, but not buckets of it all at once.
by Judy Handley | Jul 20, 2026 | 2026 Life Logs |
2026 Life Logs, Day 201: Chocolate Brooklyn Babka
Date: Monday, July 20, 2026
Weather: Sunny; High Temp 80, Low 64 degrees F
Location: At Home with My Shadow, Falmouth, MA
A little Chocolate Brooklyn Babka goes a long way. Let me explain. I got up too early, unable to sleep because I was worried about my sister. I worked all morning talking to various health care entities, PT, primary care, memory care family support, and by noon I was exhausted. So, I actually went outside with Shadow and sat in sun. Of course, I fell asleep until I hear Shadow bark and another ‘dog’ bark back. As I awakened, this continued until I finally realized the other ‘dog’ was my neighbor Andy. We had a nice conversation, and I then went inside to have lunch. I was on the phone with memory care family support again, when I heard knocks on the front door and then someone walked in. I do have a ‘walk right on in policy’, so that didn’t seem weird. It was a book club friend delivering a goodie package. She put the package down and we waved as I continued talking on the phone. But when I got off the phone and read the note on the package, I learned that Dena had brought me a Chocolate Brooklyn Babka from Trader Joe’s. I had no idea what that was, but it ended up to be the most delicious thing I have had to eat for weeks. It was just what I needed to jolt me out of the doldrums I have been experiencing. Thank you, Dena.
This evening Indivisible Falmouth, Falmouth Immigrant Rights Coalition, and Latinx in Action hosted a vigil for all of the victims of ICE violence. I was proud to be MC for the program with speakers from the faith community, local government, the immigrant community, and the Falmouth Immigrant Rights Coalition. It was just the right number of people and just the right speakers who said just the right things. So grateful to be a part of this wonderful community.
