by Judy Handley | Jan 31, 2020 | 2020 Life Logs |
2020 Life Logs, Day 31: Changing the Way I Think
Date: Friday, January 31, 2020
Weather: Mostly Sunny; High 39 degrees, Low 32 degrees F
Location: At Home in The Cottage, East Falmouth, MA
If there was a theme in my life this week it was changing the way I think about certain things. I have been reading the fiction Pulitzer Prize winning book of the year, The Overstory by Richard Powers, that Heather gave it to me for Christmas. When you read reviews of the book, they are mixed. The Guardian review was not so favorable. The Atlantic review was laudatory. I am not quite finished with the book, but I can see both sides. But whatever side you come down on, reading the book definitely changes the way you think about trees, and more broadly about our role as ‘keepers’ of the world in which we live. I love one quote from the book, “The best arguments in the world won’t change a person’s mind. The only thing that can do that is a good story.” The Guardian review finds the story offensive. It basically says that the book was written with the purpose of converting minds to support a cause. And they say that is the opposite of literature. But the general consensus seems to be that the book was written “to help people think some other way about a world that we’re running through very quickly” and that different way of thinking is a good thing. It is definitely a story that helps reconnect us to the natural world that we have become so discounted from. And it has totally changed the way I think about trees, the forest eco-system, even the briers that I have removing from the woods around the cottage.
Today I spent my entire day reading a book by a Cape Cod author, Melissa Berryman. Sure wish I had known about Melissa and her book before I brought Shadow into my home. I would have done things very differently. But it is not too late. I just need some training to help me auto-correct. Melissa lives very close-by and trains people to better handle their dogs. Her business is called People Training for Good Dogs (PTFGD). She does not do dog training. She teaches dog owners about ‘dog handling’, or in other words, she does people training. She makes a comparison between types of dogs and Generals and Privates in the military. If you have a General, he will be in charge. If you have a Private, he’ll do what you say without question. Shadow might not have been a General when I got him, but I have allowed him to become that. Now I have to undo that. I have to be the General or the leader of the pack. It is a whole different way of thinking about being a dog owner. It fits with what Joe the Dogman said in our class on Wednesday. So much to learn. But how lucky I am that Melissa and PTFGD is less than 6 miles from here. Her training is expensive, but her approach makes so much sense to me. And I think life with Shadow will be so much better once he knows his place in the scheme of things. I will definitely become a student in training with Melissa as soon as possible.
I got word that a first cousin that I grew up with died peacefully this afternoon surrounded by family. I just talked to her three weeks ago and had no idea that her life was so close to the end. She is a year younger than me and has been struggling with different health issues for years, but still it is hard to learn that a someone so close to you in age has died. Last week my good friend Detta Porat’s mother passed away. A lot of sadness in one week. My thoughts are with Detta and her family and with my cousin Sidney Jane’s family.
by Judy Handley | Jan 31, 2020 | 2020 Life Logs |
2020 Life Logs, Day 30: Shadow 4, Judy 1
Date: Thursday, January 30, 2020
Weather: Mostly Sunny; High 33 degrees, Low 22 degrees F
Location: At Home in The Cottage, East Falmouth, MA
I lost the day in terms of puppy training. Shadow won 4 battles while I won only 1. The ‘homework’ I was given by the dog trainer didn’t go smoothly. He could easily get Shadow to sit and stay even when there was a treat before him that he couldn’t have until he sat for at least 20 seconds. When I tried it, we made it only 5 seconds. It did become painfully clear to me today that I have let this beautiful, sweet puppy become Top Dog and he is not going to easily let me take his place as leader of the pack. I did win one battle and that was with using the snap collar to keep him from pulling when on a walk. That gave me my 1 point. But on 4 different occasions when I went to put his leash on to take him outside, he was nippy and just wouldn’t give in. Shadow definitely won the day today. But I will persist and hope tomorrow the score comes into my favor. We shall see.
I drove off Cape, just across the bridge to Buzzards Bay, for a 1 pm meeting with a representative from the Bourne Newcomers group to check out the technical set-up for my presentation before their Lunch and Learn group in two weeks. It is always a relief to know that the technology set-up for any presentation is in place. It was, so we adjourned to a nearby Dunkin’ Donuts to have coffee and conversation. I then drove home and took Shadow to the Dog Park as suggested by Joe the Dogman. I had never been there before and found there is large dog fenced in area, a small dog fenced in area, and a time-out area between to the two. There were lots of dogs playing in the large dog area, but they were too big and too aggressive for Shadow. We went into the small dog area where there were no dogs and played for a bit, but I’ll have to return on future days and hope that there will be some small dogs to play with. It is a really nice area and Shadow did enjoy watching the big dogs play. When we got home I took Shadow on a long walk and then I left again. This was for a Women in Newcomers dinner back across the bridge, very close to where I had been earlier in the afternoon. It was great to get together with this group, but driving across the bridge twice in one day is not something I want to do often.
Tomorrow my day starts with a vet appointment when Shadow will get a shot to prevent Lyme disease. There is not such a shot for people, but the shot for dogs has shown to be effective in somewhere between 60 and 85 per cent of the dogs who receive it. Since I live with forest on three sides, the chance of getting a tick bite is huge. And since seeing a tick on a dog with lots of black hair is almost nil, the shot seems like a good idea. After the vet appointment, we’ll come home and work on the training program. Sure hope it goes more smoothly tomorrow.
by Judy Handley | Jan 29, 2020 | 2019 Life Logs |
2020 Life Logs, Day 29: Leader of the Pack
Date: Wednesday, January 29, 2020
Weather: Partly Sunny; High 39 degrees, Low 24 degrees F
Location: At Home in The Cottage, East Falmouth, MA
Today I had my first training session as a puppy owner. The first thing I learned is that Shadow thinks he is the leader of the pack, not me. And in an hour and a half I was given instruction on how to move myself into the leadership position. It all sounds so easy, but it is not. Shadow is a smart and headstrong puppy and I have to be smarter and more headstrong. We’ll have another ‘class’ in a week and half and we’ll see if I am able to be carry through with the instruction. Here’s the basic premise of the Dogman Training: “Dogs are domesticated wolves. To live successfully with your dog, you must be the pack leader. In order to get that message thru to your dog, there must be corrections. We use the leash and collar to correct our dogs because a correction on the neck makes sense to the dog.” It requires using a chain collar on Shadow and pulling or snapping it with the leash every time he doesn’t comply with instructions. I hate the idea, but I did see that it works. So, I will give it my best try. Already he walks with me on walks, not pulling me along. One of my assignments is to get him to sit and stay while I put food in front of him for a full five minutes before letting him eat. I managed 45 seconds today and that was not easy. So, we shall see. But I do like Joe, the trainer, and I will at least complete class number two before deciding if this is the training program for me and my Shadow. And the one really good thing about the session was that Shadow loved meeting Joe’s eight-month old puppy named Stubby. Shadow has not been around many other dogs, but he interacted very playfully with Stubby. Joe suggests I start taking him to the Dog Park to play with other dogs.
I took Ollie to his violin lesson this afternoon and afterwards we went to the Falmouth Pet Center and bought a couple of new fish for my aquarium. Ollie chose two Neon Tetras. Then tonight I played Mah Jongg. That is another challenging hurdle for me. Try as I might, I still can’t get all of the rules straight. But I love being with the group of women I play with and will continue on for the rest of winter and spring before deciding if this is something I want to continue.
by Judy Handley | Jan 28, 2020 | 2020 Life Logs |
2020 Life Logs, Day 28: Update from Puerto Rico
Date: Tuesday, January 28, 2020
Weather: Overcast; High 41 degrees, Low 26 degrees F
Location: At Home in The Cottage, East Falmouth, MA
Justin called early this morning just to say hello and I was able to get a bit of an update on what is going on with the earthquakes in Puerto Rico. They are still happening, but not as many and not quite as strong as they were. But he did say that the quakes had been down in the 3’s, but more recently the intensity has gone back up into the 4’s. All Justin really knows is that people there are wondering if they have already had the BIG quake or whether all the quakes they have been having are leading up to an even bigger one. He said that one expert has weighed in saying that he believes the 6.4 quake on January 7 was probably the big one. But no one knows. Justin said that there are hundreds of people living in temporary camps on the south coast as they have lost their homes. He and Jo are very grateful that they live far enough away from the epicenter to only feel the tremors when the quakes approach the 6 level. They are grateful that they chose the home they chose to buy in the location they chose as it has served them well through the hurricanes and now the earthquakes. They do have the aggravation of not having water or electricity on some days, but that seems minor compared to what others are going through. Still it is hard on the nerves. Here’s hoping the tremors end soon.
I spent most of my day writing and meeting with Christina Brodie to do peer review of the pieces we have written for our Memoir Writing class. I found the peer review process very helpful and so did Christina. So we plan to continue to meet in person to review future pieces. When I left Christina’s I had just enough time to come home to get Shadow and take him to Heather and Jed’s to wait for Ollie to walk home from school. He had a tennis lesson at 4:30 but Jed had to go to the dentist with Jonah and Heather had to take Sam to his weekly drum lesson. That left me to take Ollie to the tennis lesson. I used the opportunity to do a laundry load and while Ollie was in his lesson, I took Shadow for a walk. So a very productive two hours. Tomorrow morning Shadow and I have our first class with the trainer here at home. This could be most interesting. I’ll fill you in tomorrow night.
by Judy Handley | Jan 27, 2020 | 2020 Life Logs |
2020 Life Logs, Day 27: Mundane Monday
Date: Monday, January 27, 2020
Weather: Partly Sunny; High 43 degrees, Low 30 degrees F
Location: At Home in The Cottage, East Falmouth, MA
No earth-shattering news from here today. It was a mundane Monday. I did make an appointment with a dog trainer and I spent time organizing any writing I have done to date that might be included in a book about the Voyage of Windbird. Then there was reading, working on what I think is another impossible 1,500 piece puzzle, walking, walking, and playing with Shadow, and doing some cooking. Mundane. But let me share a quote about mundane from B, F. Skinner. “Even the mundane task of washing dishes by hand is an example of the small tasks and personal activities that once filled people’s daily lives with a sense of achievement.” I did wash dishes by hand today since I don’t have a dish washer, so after reading this quote I am feeling a sense of achievement! More seriously, however, making progress on my writing does give me a sense of achievement and I will continue with that tomorrow morning. In the afternoon, I meet with a friend from the Memoir Writing class we are taking to do a peer review of our writing. It gives me a sense of excitement to finally be making some progress on writing.
